My nana believes that choosing to be single as a woman is a one-way ticket to Misery Town, complete with a lifetime subscription to Ben & Jerry’s and sad girl books.
My mum agrees.
However, according to 60% of zillennials like me and a study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, single ladies are the happiest.
The study, led by University of Toronto psychologists Elaine Hoan and Geoff MacDonald, surveyed over 6,000 heterosexual single adults from ten studies and showed that unpartnered babes are way happier than their male counterparts in almost every aspect.
On every question, single Black women reported being more satisfied with their lives than single Black men. They were happier being on their own, more sexually satisfied, and more content in general.
And no, they’re not sitting around waiting for someone to put a ring on it.
“One common stereotype is that single women are unattractive and miserable ‘spinsters’ while single men are labeled as romantically desired ‘bachelors,’” Hoan and MacDonald noted. “But this couldn’t be further from the truth.”
In fact, these findings seemed to flip the script on outdated narratives that paint single Black women as the unhappier gender.
So, why are Black single women happier?
Well, one possible reason single Black women are happier than their guy counterparts is that they tend to have solid support systems outside of romance. Hello, besties.
Additionally, as Black women become more financially independent, their need for a partner lessens. Hoan and MacDonald summed it up best: “One traditional advantage for women in partnering with men, aka income, is dissipating.”
So, with that factor out of the equation, single Black women have more room to consider what actually matters in relationships, and if we’re truly honest, the math doesn’t always math.
The study highlighted inequities in heterosexual relationships, from unpaid household labor to the deprioritization of women’s sexual pleasure, things that leave most women feeling drained.
“These historically lead to more rewards for men and more costs for women in committed heterosexual partnerships,” the experts suggested.
So, in this regard, single Black men “have more to gain from partnering than do single women.”
Another study found that single Black women, especially millennials and Gen Z, romanticize solitude in ways single Black men don’t. They thrive by chasing their passions, living authentically, and enjoying their own company.
And while some trends and researchers seem to suggest that Black women are better off tying the knot, 60% show that the single babes are doing pretty well for themselves.
Like did you know single Black women own more homes than single Black men in the U.S.? No? Check the statistics here.
And although it might be expensive being single (them bills, y’all), many Black women today would rather pay the singles tax if it means dodging toxic relationships.
In short, more Black women are choosing peace, self-love, and happiness over relationships that drain them, and honestly, that’s a flex.
Or what do you think?
Have you found happiness in your singlehood, or do you feel society still pushes outdated ideals?
We’d love to hear your perspective.
