Three. Freakin’. Years.
Three freakin’ years scrolling through more dating apps than there are spices on a Caribbean island. And what do you have to show for it?
The same tired profiles, the same recycled jokes (seriously, who still thinks pick-up lines work?), and a message inbox drier than last week’s edges.
Sis, you’ve swiped right on every decent dude within a 50-mile radius, and frankly, you’re tired. Tired of the catfish, tired of the radio silence, tired of the whole damn dating scene.
We feel you, babe. We’ve got the “3 am wyd” yawn texts clogging our phone history to prove it.
But wait. Before you resign yourself to a life of takeout menus and Netflix reruns, have you considered speed dating?
Yes, speed dating. The low-pressure kind of dating where you meet quality people looking for real connections, not just another hookup or a melanated body for their Tinder stats?
Think pre-screened “stand on business” people waiting to be mesmerized by your everything, all taking place in a chill, non-pressurized environment (unlike these online dates, which are five times likely to end in restraining orders and frantic calls to Olivia Benson).
But, like with almost everything in life, even the smoothest talker needs a game plan when the clock’s ticking – because speed dating is all about maximizing those precious minutes and making a lasting first impression.
So, below, you’ll find the ultimate speed dating tips, guaranteed to turn those quick chats into “when’s our next date?” faster than you can say “swipe right.”
The Early Bird Catches the Best Dates
Arriving early at your speed dating event is like showing up to a Beyoncé concert – you get first dibs on the good stuff.
You snag the best seats and get a chance to strike up a conversation with the organizers (who’ll def have the best intel on other amazing attendees).
Plus, you have a chance to mentally rehearse your killer conversation starters – no more deer-in-headlights moments, just pure, captivating queen energy.
Be the Vibe Curator. Not Just a Participant
Speed dating isn’t just about finding a match – it’s about creating an unforgettable experience.
Rock a statement outfit that shows off your personality while being classy, and don’t be afraid to ship out your best heels, too.
Also, bring a conversation starter that’s not a cheesy pick-up line (think a fun fact or a conversation prompt) and radiates positive energy.
Here are a few conversation starters to get your creative juices flowing:
- Instead of “What do you do,” start with something like, “Tell me three words that sum up your life right now.”
- Ask about their favorite childhood snack. Trust us, nothing breaks the ice like debating the merits of Dunkaroos vs. Gushers.
- Quick “Would You Rather” questions such as Beyoncé or Rihanna? Jamaican Jerk Chicken or KFC Chicken? Is a fun and creative way that tells you a lot about their tastes.
- Rather than fishing for compliments, give your speed dating partner one, and make it quirky. “You look like you’d be great at parallel parking” is memorable and sparks conversation.
- Instead of asking about superpowers, ask what mundane ability they’d make a superpower. “I’d turn my ability to always find the ripest avocado into a superpower!”
Channel Your Inner Beyoncé: Listen
Yes, you want to showcase your amazing personality, but true connection comes from genuine listening. Actively listen to what your date is saying and ask follow-up questions that demonstrate your interest.
And sis, leave the baggage at the door. Speed dating isn’t therapy hour. Refrain from talking about your ex and past relationship woes. Keep the conversation positive and focused on getting to know your dates.
Authenticity Is Your Speed Dating Secret Weapon
First impressions are key in speed dating, so ditch the “resting grudge face” and embrace a genuine smile. Think confident and approachable, not someone stuck in rush hour traffic.
Feel free to showcase your personality and passions! People are drawn to those who are comfortable in their own skin. Sure, good posture and a positive attitude project well, but don’t feel pressured to be someone you’re not.
The goal here is to connect with someone on a real level. Faking it might get you through a minute, but a smile that reflects your excitement and a conversation that showcases your true self is what will leave a lasting impression.
Sloppy Sally Doesn’t Get the Cheese
You’ve arrived early, with some time to spare, but the butterflies are doing a tap dance routine in your stomach. What do you do?
Shot time! Uh…maybe not? Having a cocktail or two to relax is fine, but turning into Sloppy Sally won’t net you contact information post-event. Our advice?
Stay relatively sober throughout the speed dating experience to ensure you make the best first impression possible.
The More Chances You Take, The More Dates You’ll Get
Listen, sis, we all have our preferences (tall, dark, and reads Dostoevsky, anyone?). But speed dating is about stepping outside your comfort zone and meeting new people. Think of it as an adventure in human connection!
The more “hells yes” you give (even if it’s just to the guy who can quote every line from Game of Thrones), the more dates you’ll score. Who knows, you might discover your perfect match is hiding beneath a baseball cap and a love for obscure medieval fantasy novels.
Choose the Right Speed Dating Event
Not all speed dating events are created equal. Many cater to specific age groups, hobbies, or even professions.
Doing a little research and choosing an event that aligns with your interests and preferences can significantly increase your chances of meeting compatible matches. (scroll to the end *wink*)
Don’t Be Afraid to Follow Up (But Respect Boundaries)
If you hit it off with someone, don’t be shy about expressing your interest. A simple “It was great meeting you! Would you like to grab coffee sometime?” can go a long way.
However, always be respectful of boundaries. If you don’t get a response, that’s okay! Move on and focus on the next connection.
Remember, sis, speed dating is a fun way to meet new people, not a desperate search for a soulmate. Embrace the experience, showcase your amazing self, and who knows, love might be a few captivating conversations away!
You are cordially invited…..
With that said….. if you have made it this far in the post, we have to assume that you are ready for your own Speed Dating experience!
We are so excited to announce our first collaborative event of the Summer a SPEED DATING MIXER with The Single Mom Network organization and The Dating Project during ESSENCE FESTIVAL!
If you would like to join us at the Moxy Hotel during Essence fest for this amazing chance at finding love or just a dope experience click here to learn more.
