In a now-viral Tweet T.I’s Daughter, Deyjah Harris expressed honest sentiments about being sad that she has her father’s hair texture:
i hate to say/admit it, buttttt ): i’m so sad that i have my dad’s hair texture ): sad because it’s so much to deal with/ manage ugh. sad because i feel like it just doesn’t fit me nor is this texture one that’s appreciated or uplifted as much as the other hair textures
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 27, 2021
and then she followed up with this:
anytime i see someone with type 4 hair, i ALWAYS compliment them because i know how it feels to genuinely NOT like your hair/texture. i never want anyone to feel like that. it looks soooo bomb on other people, but me? yeah no.
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 27, 2021
The tweets caused a fair amount of negative backlash and she decided to give more context around that sentiment.
Nobody
Y’all: “I hate looking black and have phenotypical black features” like pls
— Kaneki’s Gurl (@Rensmistress) August 28, 2021
and:
Girl how yo own hair don’t fit you ?
— Whore of Babylon (@gr8vybby) August 28, 2021
She shared that she never really heard any compliments about her hair. She was told that it was ‘nappy’ or two thick.
She said she doesn’t think there is anything is wrong with Type 4 Hair but, “her hair is difficult for her” to manage.
She writes:
since twitter won’t let me type everything i wanted to say in one tweet? i wrote my response in my notes and screenshot it for you. https://t.co/bu2XMxxQVg pic.twitter.com/Kdtl7mto8L
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 28, 2021
This is always a very touchy topic because women often feel the stress of caring for their hair but aren’t always allowed to express it without being accused of self-hate.
With that said can one cleanly distinguish between hating the process of managing their hair and actually hating the texture of their hair?
There is so much to unpack when it comes to how we view kinky hair types, and if you had all day, this post would be endless.
Feeling the heat Deyjah shared that she wants her feed to be a safe space for people to freely express how they feel.
Some agreed others challenged her on what she was saying.
hello (: with the tweet that i made about not personally liking my hair texture, did any of you all feel offended or feel as though i was being negative towards/aboit type 4 hair?
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 28, 2021
and:
Honestly girl……. I understood what you were saying, but ii think the wording did give off alil self hate in a sense. You see have Don have 4c hair( I actually don’t really know my hair texture as I’m mixed coolie) but even sooo there were times ii found myself hating my hair
— ??QueenPosh?? (@_QueenPosh_) August 28, 2021
and:
We understand, but when are you going to embrace it ?! That would be the best way to start loving it, instead of just complimenting others on being able to wear their 4C out. Its not going anywhere. And keeping it under those wigs is not helping us
— The real reel (@therealreel2020) August 29, 2021
and:
We understand, but when are you going to embrace it ?! That would be the best way to start loving it, instead of just complimenting others on being able to wear their 4C out. Its not going anywhere. And keeping it under those wigs is not helping us
— The real reel (@therealreel2020) August 29, 2021
Deyjah continued:
their hair* my bad … but yeah /; of course i’d never intentionally offend anyone, but i shouldn’t have to keep walking on eggshells or being unauthentic when it comes to saying how i feel about MYSELF. https://t.co/65hZfAaWP6
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 29, 2021
and:
nope, not this time (: i’m actually focusing on the uplifting/positive comments as opposed to the negative or derogatory comments. the tweet was only about/to myself, but i was OPEN about how i feel because i knew others might possibly be able to relate…. and some of them did! https://t.co/9KKHUqB6bt
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 29, 2021
and:
we should all be able to be honest about how we feel and should all be able to speak/rock our truth, no matter what and no matter who doesn’t like it/how hard they try to quiet our voice.
— Deyjah Harris? (@yafavdeyj) August 29, 2021
We have been sharing content about natural hair for years (9 years to be exact) and the stats are always the same, women SAY they love type 4 hair but the data always shows otherwise.
Pictures and content that show or demonstrate looser textures of hair, get way more interactions (likes and shares) than type 4 hair.
If we could pick one thing from the conversation around Deyjah’s post that she is correct about, it would be that we do need to start being very honest about how we are feeling about our natural hair.
We also need to be able to talk about how we feel free of judgment.
Once we create spaces where women are honest, regardless of how it might sound or hurt, then we can begin to fix and work through the details of truly caring for our thick beautiful hair.
Comment below and let us know what you think.
