Ah, Nov 29. The day Instagram feeds worldwide went wild, with everyone sharing their end-of-year Spotify-wrapped stats.
And while our top songs, top artists, and top genres gave us a little insight into our mood (shoutout to my fellow anti-heroes and vampires) and general mental space in 2023, we believe there’s still a lot more to learn about yourself as a Black woman that Spotify Wrapped and thousands of hours of therapy might not have covered.
Enter the end-of-year-wrapped stats Black Girl edition. From the number of times you missed lunch for a work project (that you might not have gotten credit for) to the therapy sessions that left your therapist calling her therapist and the many ‘almosts’ that defined your 2023, we’ve got all the real, unfiltered stats – because there’s so much more to you than a curated playlist.
Now, let’s dive into it, shall we?
Dating Wrapped Stats
@tapthecreator My 2023 DATING wrapped ? #datingwrapped #datingwrapped2023 #dating #datingadvice #datingadviceforwomen #datinginyour30s #datinginyour20s #blackgirltiktok #singlelife #singlegirls ♬ original sound – TAP
- 15,030,800 – The number of seconds you spent asking the God of Ciara & Nicole Parker to come through because you were tired of dating down
- 136,550 – Minutes spent agreeing to plans last minute
- 317,995 – Minutes spent asking, ‘Where do you see yourself in five years?’
- 40 – The number of times you considered pulling an Ashanti and giving your semi-still-might-have-potential ex a second chance
- 12,375 – Minutes you spent leaving voicemails that sounded like scenes from Brown Sugar, Love & Basketball, and Survival Of The Thickest
- 160 – The number of times you were ‘over it.’
- 525,700 – The minutes you spent in 2023 talking shit about your ex’s sun sign
- 365 – The number of days that yummy Black man/the love of your life told and showed you how much he loves you, appreciated your Black beauty, treated you like the Queen you are, and promised you the world
- 25 – The number of times you swiped right only to get disappointed after the first date
- 900 – The number of times you took screenshots of comically bad profiles – coincidentally, that’s the number of times you also successfully canceled on every single guy/girl in a 60-mile radius
- 50 – The number of times you felt like the anti-hero
- 13,500 – The minutes ‘escapism’ lived in your head rent-free
Career Wrapped Stats
- 390,006 – Minutes spent contemplating about quitting your job
- 10 – The number of times you accepted help from others (65% of the time was spent saying, ‘Fine, I’ll do it myself’)
- 678,002 – Minutes spent passionately talking about your dreams or niche subject
- 219,110 – Minutes you spent trying to share good news without sounding like you’re ‘bragging.’
- 560,769 – The number of times you had your tabs open at the same time
- 50 – The number of times you forgot to have lunch in 2023
- 1970 – The number of times you joined calls, most of which could’ve been emails – and you were mute 80% of the time
- 50 – The number of times you dialed into calls from the airport – but only one came out on top (you at the O’Hare International Airport)
- 975,432 – The minutes you spent muttering curses under your breath because some idiot wasn’t listening to your input
- 14,400 – The minutes you spent procrastinating on work because imposter syndrome paid you a visit
- 400 – The number of times you ‘huh-ed’ and ‘are you serious-ed’ your Gen Z colleague
- 124,970 – The minutes you spent listening to your coworker’s keyboard clicking
- 142 – The number of excuses you made to have a day off (you completely maximized your creativity this year)
Financial Wrapped Stats
- 200 – The times you spent keeping receipts and screenshots, just in case
- 525,650 – Minutes spent being your own sugar daddy
- 12,986,543 – The seconds you spent wishing you won the lottery or had someone to pay for all your bills
- 40,320 – Minutes you spent trying to make a good financial decision
- 10,324 – The minutes you spent questioning your financial decisions – which coincidentally matches the number of times you spent queuing for Beyonce and SZA tickets
- 18,164 – Minutes spent waiting for your assurance package (you ended up spending everything soon after, anyway)
- 43,194 – The minutes spent recalculating your budget after the Black Friday, Memorial Day and Amazon Prime Day Sales
- 250 – The number of days you made Black Girl financial power moves
The ‘Almost Did That’ Stats
- 10 – the bags of lettuce and arugula you almost used but eventually became mush in the refrigerator
- 300 – The number of times you almost cracked the code to the ‘Tyla Water Dance’ (this challenge was hilarious)
- 180 – The number of times you spent almost scheduling a gyno’s appointment and then forgetting
- 15 – The number of times you signed up for a Pilates class and almost canceled it to sleep in (actually did; we didn’t want to call you out ?)
- 60 – The number of times you almost attained your goals, but someone and their calabashes couldn’t just let you thrive
- 20 – The number of times you almost stormed into your boss’ office to quit but couldn’t get yourself to do it (we feel you, sis)
- 10 – The number of times you almost yelled ‘fight me’ over minor inconveniences but called upon all your ancestors for some zen
- 30 – The number of times you almost got your flight upgraded
- 19 – Hobbies? Sure, you ‘almost’ tried them, but we’re counting on you to complete them in 2024
Scrolling/Streaming Wrapped Stats
- 114,040 – Minutes spent watching cult documentaries and reading conspiracy theories online
- 306, 145 – Minutes spent avoiding TikTok but sending recycled reels to your besties
- 122 – The number of times you replied ‘lol’ to a reel you’d already watched before rather than tell your friend you’d seen it
- 32 – The hours you spent re-watching Insecure, Girlfriends, and Scandal instead of watching a new show
- 30,567 – The number of times you Instagram stalked your compared your high school and campus classmates (OMG, are they all engaged, parents, and top executives at their firms now?)
- 736,975 – Minutes you spent watching cute animal videos on social media
- 45,768 – Minutes spent watching Karens fuck up a nonchalant Black man or woman just because
- 126,879 – The number of times you watched a police officer harass another Black person, authorities not take domestic violence cases seriously, fellow Black Queens complain about not getting what’s owed to them (we hear you Taraji, Monique, and Viola Davis)
- 13, 415 – Minutes you spent talking about the Keke Palmer and Darius Jackson situation. Not forgetting trying to figure out if Jonathan Majors was being railroaded
- 20 – The number of times you watched the ‘Random Man From Atlanta’ stories
- 27,453 – The minutes you spent focusing on the wrong things (hello, ADHD)
- #1 – The spot ‘Queen Charlotte’ landed on your streaming-wrapped category (can’t wait for Bridgerton Part 3)
Mental Health Wrapped Stats
- 62,009 – Minutes you spent venting about your boss, ex-friend, partner, and family to your bestie and therapist
- 30,000 – Minutes you spent not answering calls because you couldn’t get yourself to talk to anyone (it was better than last year at least)
- 126,458 – Minutes you spent erasing your digital footprint and texts you sent to your bestie and partner when mad
- 111,005 – seconds you spent self-filtering your own journal or venting session
- 587,600 – The minutes you spent in 2023 wondering if Mercury was ever going to come out of retrograde
- #2 – spot anxiety and insomnia landed on the mental wellness wrapped category with Jan, Feb, Apr, May, Jun, Sept, Oct, Nov, and Dec being the peak months
- 29,453,400 – Seconds spent existentially spiraling, then suddenly optimistic
- 0.000 – The number of times you spent listening to anyone’s BS
- 18 – The number of tissue boxes you’ve used while watching The Color Purple (no shame, we did too)
- 78,286 – The number of minutes you spent internally screaming, monologuing, and uttering subliminal affirmations
- 47 – The number of times you stared into the void in a towel after taking a shower
Beauty, Fun & Wellness 2023 Wrapped Stats
@sowonthego 2023, you’ve been good to me. Can’t wait for what’s in store for me in 2024 #travel #traveltok #solotravel #solofemaletraveler #blackgirltiktok #blacktravel #blackwomentravel #blacktravelfeed #blacksolotravel #bipoctravel #woctravel #americanabroad #travelwrapped ♬ Paint The Town Red (Instrumental) – Doja Cat
- 365 – The number of days you stuck to your skincare routine without faultering (kuddos, sis!)
- 167,001 – minutes you spent deciding what and where to eat
- 500 – The number of times you wanted to hit the buy button on your Sephora cart but couldn’t because the math wasn’t matching
- 20 – The number of times you experienced the ‘Joy Of Missing Out’ rather than dying with FOMO – well until the Renaissance Tour started
- 3000– the number of items you checked out from Amazon, Nordstrom, Ulta, Sephora, Zappos, and Zara
- 10% – You were in the top percentile of Black women who had everything working out for them in 2023 #manifestationreallydoeswork
- 274 – The number of times you brewed a cup of coffee or tea and completely forgot about it
- 300,000 – The minutes you spent unapologetically prioritizing your needs, channeling the soft girl era and choosing you over everything else
- 32,000 – The minutes you spent being so soooooooo eepy
- 1440 – The hours you found yourself reverting back to your masculine energy because some idiot couldn’t just handle what they were supposed to
- 90, 200 – The minutes you spent praying your bags made it to Europe, Africa, Asia, or the Caribbean
- 12,441,600 – The seconds you spent feeling like an imposter, doubting if you’re worthy, and dealing with motherhood guilt
- 125 – The times your Gen Z sibling had to explain the glazed donut and latte makeup trend. And wait, guys are washing their hair with Dawn dish soap now?
- #3 – spot in which your candle and perfume buying activities landed on the wellness-wrapped category, with September and February being the peak months
- 12,000 – Minutes spent dreaming up your next hairstyle, hair color, and tattoo
As we enter another year, we wish you nothing but ease and peace. May all your wishes come true, you get what’s yours (we’re not taking mediocre anymore), and thrive like nobody’s business! You are it, hun, remember that!
